My Lola Anecdote #2: Cough Medicine

As my body is racked with continuous coughing, I suddenly remembered Lola Tita. The last time I was coughing like a maniac, I was still living in her house. She recommended that I try a cough medicine that she got from Tita Ayet. I remember snapping at her since the medicine did not take effect right away. Yes, I'm not proud of doing that but I was in so uncomfortable and having a hard time already.

But I also remember that after hurting my lola's feelings, I would always cuddle her and tell her that I was sorry and I love her. I am glad that I was able to tell her those precious words time and again before she left us.

Lola, I miss you. Sometimes I still go through the motions of living without thinking that you are now gone since there's still a part of me that refuses to believe it.

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Those we love don't go away, they walk beside us every day. 

Unseen, unheard, but always near. Still loved, still missed and very dear. 

- Unknown

Goodbye Employment, Hello Grad School!

Today is my first day without a job. I spent the last four years working for Wacoal and honestly, it's quite a relief that I finally resigned. So many things have changed in my life for the past year and I feel like I need to let go of my job (the last constant thing in my life) in order to fly. They say that in order to grow, you need to leave your comfort zone. Right now, I am so far from my comfort zone and I do hope that the new experiences I will embark on will help me grow as a person. I am terrified of the future. I don't know if I'm actually doing the right thing. I so want to have that change, I want a life makeover, and yet, I am so scared of the change and of the thought that I might dive into this whole new world and nothing will change.

Let's call drama to a halt. Here's a list of things I will miss and not miss about working.

I will not miss the train especially the MRT. Yes, it belongs on top of the list!
I will not miss running along Ayala just to make it on time.
I will not miss spending a small fortune paying cab drivers.
I will not miss waking up super early in the morning.
I will not miss the super stress factors and the work that I have to bring home especially on sale months.

I will miss considering my walk from the office to the Ayala MRT in the evenings as my exercise for the day.
I will miss impromptu Giligan's nights with my colleagues.
I will miss my crazy friends. You know who you are.
I will miss the camaraderie I had with the other staff and Beauty Advisers.
I will miss the bosses who rarely raise their voice.
I will miss planning for a brand.
I will miss being in a whirl when preparing for the monthly meetings.
I will miss being surrounded by good people.
I will miss travelling with my officemates. Hey, let's still do this even if I'm no longer with you guys.
I will miss having so many 'papables' in the office. Hahahaha.
I will miss the photoshoots.
I will miss being interviewed for TV segments. Hahaha.
I will miss earning money.

And yes, even with the slight fear, I am excited.

I am excited to start my MBA.
I am excited to learn new things.
I am excited to study and prepare for exams. Yes, I missed these!
I am excited to meet new people.
I am excited to start my new adventure!

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We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.

– Joseph Campbell

Be willing to be a beginner every single morning.

– Meister Eckhart

Don’t worry about being worried. You’re heading out on an adventure and you can always change your mind along the way and try something else. 

- Tracy Kidder

Some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity. 

-Gilda Radner